Friday, July 04, 2008

A Response to Ruthie's Blog

Ruthie just posted a blog and (much more eloquently than I could) described something I've been feeling for a few weeks now.


Am I supposed to feel older than I do?  I've got friends who are having babies, getting engaged and married, and buying houses.  I guess I thought when I graduated from college, some switch was going to be switched and I would all of sudden feel like a grownup.  

Instead, I do lots of grownup things.  I pay rent, bills, use a credit card, work a full time (and amazing) job, pay taxes, look for new apartments, make important decisions on my life without running it by my parents... but I still feel like a teenager playing house sometimes.

I was wondering if there really is a switch that flips.  If I look at my life honestly, I don't really feel old enough to be married.  I REALLY don't feel old enough to own a home.  Is that why I'm not married yet?  Do I need to feel old enough to be married?  Or does everyone feel this unprepared?

Maybe it comes with working with teens.  But I look at the teens and I know that I'm older and (ha ha) wiser than them (only because I've gone through more life experiences).  But I look at my friends who are married and I don't feel as old as them (even though I'm older than them). 

The great thing is that I'm blessed to have friends who are also in this strange limbo.  Do you guys feel the same way?  Do feel like you need a switch to be flipped before you proceed onto bigger responsibilities of life?  Or are the bigger responsibilities what flip that switch?

1 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know what you mean. I still don't feel grown up, even though the calendar and life experiences say I am. I predict there won't be a switch flipped or an event in your life that makes you say, "I've arrived. I'm an adult now."
It's a good feeling to have.
Alice McD